Every year after we flip the calendar to a new year we are barraged with ideas and products aimed at inspiring us to be successful.
Much of what is promoted is about becoming successful with your money or career. Judging by the majority of material out there, it would seem that those two things are the only true measures of success.
But what does the word ‘success’ really mean?
What is the meaning of success?
Defining success
Merriam-Webster defines success as:
a. Degree or measure of succeeding
b. Favorable or desired outcome also: the attainment of wealth, favor, or eminence
c. One that succeeds
Most of the marketing about success out there relates to the money aspect in definition b. It’s all about how to be successful with money, career, business, or status.
Why? I suspect it’s because it sells.
Being successful and making boatloads of money is the American dream. We’re taught this way of thinking from a very young age. Bigger is better. More is better. Luxury is better.
But Why?
Measuring success
Is living the ‘American dream’ the only path to success? Or, is it possible that the measure of success that is promoted by our culture (i.e. American dream) not the true measure of the success of a person?
Is the saying “Whoever dies with the most toys wins!” not a good mission statement for life?
If societal pressures are correct, then those living in the largest, most extravagant homes must be successful? What about clothes? To be successful do you have to shop at top of the line designer stores for your wardrobe? What about the car? Does the benchmark for success require that you drive a Beamer?
That sounds like a very shallow and vain definition of success (in my opinion). Just because someone has the trappings of success, doesn’t mean they’re successful.
These ‘successful’ people could be so heavily leveraged and living beyond their means that they are one paycheck away from the house of cards tumbling down.
And really, do nice things really matter that much? Pretty sure your last thoughts on your deathbed won’t be about some nice piece of crap you never got the pleasure of owning…
Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.” – Maya Angelou
We all want our families to have the lifestyle we believe they deserve. In reality, financing this lifestyle can have an enormous cost. And not just in dollars.
As with anything in life, everything comes with a cost. There are tradeoffs and sacrifices made to make the money to pay for all of the crap you buy. The more hours you spend working – the fewer you have to spend with your loved ones or to pursue other passions in life.
Inevitably, too much time sacrificed working for money results in relationships suffering. In the end, the time we sell today for a few bucks, we’ll be willing to buy back for a lot more later.
Unfortunately, time is the one commodity no one can ever buy more of. It would be wise to make good use of the precious gift of time.
What does it mean to fail?
At this point, I think it’s a good idea to visit the meaning of failure.
Merriam-Webster defines failure as:
1. A. omission of occurrence or performance
Specifically: a failing to perform a duty or expected action
B. (1) a state of inability to perform a normal function
(2) an abrupt cessation of normal functioning
C. a fracturing or giving way under stress
2. A. a lack of success
B. a failing in business
3. A. a falling short
B. deterioration, decay
4. One that has failed
The above definition, once again, focuses on the money and professional angle of what it means to fail.
I think the words of Michael Jordan better define what failure truly is.
I can accept failure. Everyone fails at something. But I can not accept not trying.” – Michael Jordan
The only real failure is not being willing to try. It doesn’t matter what aspect of life we’re talking about. Whether it be new experiences, skills, food, etc. The unwillingness to try guarantees failure.
We fail when our definition of ‘success’ is ‘excess.” – The Minimalists Podcast episode 161 Addictions
I love this quote from The Minimalist Podcast. Anything taken to excess, can and probably will lead to failure. As the saying goes, “Too much of a good thing is too much of a good thing.”.
A different path to success
Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein
Einstein’s words capture the essence of what I am trying to say very succinctly. It’s not all about the material items. In my opinion, there are a number of people in this world who have been extremely successful but don’t/didn’t have the material items to show for it.
Nikola Tesla, Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teresa, and Martin Luther King Jr are prime examples. They are all highly successful people in their own right, but never really had sustained levels of success monetarily.
One could argue these famous people enjoyed a level of ‘status’ that would qualify them as successful in the traditional sense, which I would have to say is true. Their status and notoriety are precisely why I choose them as extreme examples.
But, what if they were unknown and all else were the same? Would they be any less successful? I would say not and argue that fame and notoriety are not suitable measures of success either.
Allow yourself to be your own version of success
Try to look at your weakness and convert it into your strength. That’s
success .” – Zig Ziglar
It’s pretty clear the traditional measure of money, wealth, and status are flawed as a means to measure someone’s success. Our materialistic society has conditioned us to believe that keeping up with the Jones’ and making $250K a year are the only ways to be successful.
This isn’t true. You can make $250K a year and fail miserably at life. A life well lived is not one spent chasing success in the traditional sense, but rather, one in which creating freedom, knowledge, truth, skills, relationships, and self-improvement are valued.
I think there’s more (or less?) to it than just how many widgets we own and the size of our paychecks.
Everyone has the potential to be successful in their lives. All it takes is the courage to live your life on your terms, according to your beliefs and values, not someone else’s.
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